We’ve all been there: halfway through an intimate moment, and your brain decides it’s time to think about tomorrow’s to-do list that or worse an awkward thing you say while practising dirty talk. Being “in your head” during intimacy isn’t just annoying—it can turn the present moment into a pressure cooker of anxiety. As sex educator and psychologist Emily Nagoski points out, "Pleasure is the product of context." And guess what? Worrying about whether you’re “doing it right” or how you look in that angle? Not exactly the ideal context.
When you’re stuck in your head, your body takes a backseat. You start overthinking every move, and suddenly the natural rhythm of connection feels more like a choreography you’re fumbling through. Anxiety is the ultimate buzzkill, tightening your muscles and shutting down your ability to relax into pleasure. The solution? Anchor yourself in the now. Breathe, focus on the sensations, and stop judging your experience as if it’s a performance. Nagoski encourages us to embrace the idea that “pleasure is the measure of sexual well-being,” not perfection. How much pleasure do you allow yourself to feel in a vulnerable yet safe space?
And if your head still refuses to chill, enlist a little help—like a silky, natural coconut lube that amplifies sensation and pulls you back into your body and the moment. Whether it’s the lush glide of LUBECO.CO or a warming lube that adds a new layer of excitement, these tools remind you to savour touch, not overthink it. So, next time your brain tries to hijack your intimate moments, kindly tell it to take a seat, breathe and let your body take the wheel into the pleasure dome. The present moment is calling, and it’s a lot more fun than overthinking.
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